The Polar Plays of Perceiving Being Underestimated

Being underestimated. If you really think and feel about it, it's... sorta... obviously gonna happen.

"Oh no, people aren't getting accurate reads of me and my nuanced gestures, subtle
perceptions, abstract interpretations, and cryptic signals? WHYYY!?"

Uh yea, because most people want you to explain yourself clearly, directly, concisely, which you don't really wanna do most of the time lol (and yea yea, their inability to attend on a more subtle level is unfortunate, but let's take stock and ownership here).

"But, but, if I collapse the infinite possibilities and abstractions of life into a coherent stream of palatable conversation, it's not infinite and mysterious and poetic anymore."

Yea, well, people need you here on Earth too lol.

So it's that dynamic, as well as the "ah, who needs em?" dynamic where if we feel generally self-confident, we don't usually feel the need to advertise ourselves to this world.

Don't miss this, this pertinent polarity playing presently. You either:

• Want to be seen, heard, felt, and you inevitably need to put in the actual work to do so, as uphill as it is for an INFP, you see it as a worthy endeavor to you, at times.
  
• Or you're enjoying your rich inner life, and everyone else can underestimate/misjudge you, whatever. You're a mysterious ethereal being, and that's how you like it, at times.
  

I specify "at times" because life is a sliding scale, a spectrum. It's moment-to-moment.

We can balance seen and unseen, received and coveted, estimated and underestimated, but sometimes we want more of one than the other.

Consider the following:

• Sufficiently estimated (benefits) - more accurate reads (for both parties), others understanding of your wants and needs, more effective/ productive communication in general, good for networking and marketing yourself; self-advocating.
  
• Sufficiently underestimated (benefits) - other people stay in the zone, out of your way, you've got witchy/ wizardy business to tend to, you maintain privacy, you stay mysterious, better for observation/ awareness purposes, better for creative/ artful expression, more time/energy to focus on life's subtleties. 

Make no mistake: YOU, my friend, as an INFP, have a gift. You have THE gift (as far as I'm subjectively, biasedly concerned). The primary gift of natural inner access. That alone is priceless. Access to the depths, the birthing waters, the creative, foundational bedrock of existence. Seeing, feeling, noticing the fundamentals, the foundations of things. And as a result, seeing, feeling, noticing so much more, in general, than most people. Natural access, easy for us. We are designed to anchor here, the deepest spot any human can anchor. The inner-inner. And all good things can blossom from here. The things that others dream of (or perhaps can't even dream of because they don't have the damn imaginative capacity lol). Things deep, subtle, nuanced. Things missed by many, if not most. Soft, slow, sacred things. The gift of gifts.

Other INFP Gifts (as secondary byproducts):

• Great learners, thinkers, and imaginers, high neuroplasticity, allowing high potential for flexibility, adaptability, and general ease of life growth potential (these gifts specified as potential because, it's just going to be latent/ dormant until we bring it out, but it's here for us INFP's, just waiting for us to answer the calls)
• High creative/ imaginative potential allows us to bring forth help/ solutions no one else could come up with
• Listening/ space-holding potential allows others (especially extroverts) to heal
• Potential for seeing things from multipole angles (the typo that makes a topical new word lol) where even though we may feel bipolar at times (or octpolar lol), we can see the sides at hand and bring about balance to a situation.
• Potential for an easier time being enchanting (and enchanted).
• And you can't fake depth; you can't buy depth; we (if we foster it) have a depth-deepening system within us. 

I know it's hard sometimes to put ourselves out there. To make connections, to make money, to get things settled (let alone the tough stuff like self-advocating to get people places, things that are obsolete and toxic out of our life, to make room for the more beneficial and healthy). In a modern world not really designed for introverts, or artists, or stoic space-holders, or quiet, peaceful moments in general, let alone designed for an INFP. It can suck sometimes. But we find a way. There's always a way. You've survived this long; big kudos, much respect. Keep finding more and better ways. And not as much "it's out there" as much as it is "it's in there."

The world can toss us around, in a good way, and we can learn from that, but the take-home is really the insight from the experiences.

And being underestimated? We have so many gifts, and at such depth. And to be overly concerned about being accurately, sufficiently estimated? Externally? By relying on the perceptual acuity of others? And, in that mental-emotional turmoil, turning our inner Garden of Eden, heart-and-soul, into a heart-and-soul west side Baltimore City? Been there, literally and soulfully. Don't go there. Just don't. It ain't worth it. Don't squander your soul over some superficial social shenanigans. The gold, the compass, the lighthouse, has always been in the inner.

It ain't even realistic to expect accurate appraisal from others. Let's be real, the average person cannot, physically-mentally-emotionally-soulfully, be on our level. Not denied or decried anyone else's stride for a better world, but it's just to say... they haven't experienced what we have. Don't bring inner turmoil from temporary outer uncertainty. Don't tarnish your gift. Don't squander your soul.

I know it's much easier-said-than-done. Perhaps just consider it. Just think about it. Just feel about it. And just do about it, if you're up for it. Do something about the inner messiness, and clean it up. Whatever that means for you. And I'm here for you too. We INFPs gotta stick together. Feel free to stay in touch.

In soul fuel, fire, & goosery desire,
Mike Mair (Goosouline)